• Hello Syllabus Week

    We let our college intern ML loose on the blog and here’s where her mind wandered…

    Ah… if you’re anything like every other college kid, this is the week we’ve all been waiting for. The infamous syllabus week — It’s like welcome week in repeat. Except better. We’ve spent winter break tanning and shopping, prepping to see everyone once we’re back at campus. Fuck buddies are established, Christmas cash has got the liquor supply on high, and classes are straight bullshit for this one precious week. Professors spend 10 minutes going over the syllabus and let students out early. Complete waste of time going to class – we all trick ourselves into thinking this. After 4 nights straight of raging, maybe you’ll feel guilty about skipping and decide you’ll go to that 10:20. Hung-over, you’ll feel your way to class, crawling to your seat, blinded by the fluorescent lights. Maybe those 8 White Russians last night weren’t the best idea.

    Here’s a little inspiration to stay strong, hold in your vomit and man up. It’s syllabus week after all.

    (631): I’m afraid my bank account can’t handle syllabus week.

    (989): no where in the syllabus does it say “no alcoholic beverages allowed”.

    (231): Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week

    (973): I had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week

    (571): You yelled “bananas are an excellent source of potassium!” 4 times in the middle of class. How do you not remember?

    (703): I don’t even know what potassium is.

    (317): can you pick me up an extra syllabus

    (1-317): I passed out in the shower again

    (443): We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I’m mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.

    (612): I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.

    (817): Our professor just said “No class today, go get stoned.” A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.

    (716): I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?

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