• Cab Confessions

    We’ve all been there before — the window doesn’t roll down, there’s a mysterious stain on the cracked plastic seat, your “emergency $20″ is nowhere to be found but it appears that a friend has thrown up its equivalent in shots and you just hope to make it homeā€¦or to the next bar. Aren’t cab rides great?

    Cabbies are as varied as the cars they drive. Some want to join your party, while others only have an interest in the voice on the end of their bluetooth. Some accept more “creative” forms of payment as the rest berate you for asking if they take credit. But at the end of the night, whether they act as makeshift therapists, GPS gurus, enablers, tour guides, silent judgment-passers or party starters, they get you where you need to be. This post goes out to the cab drivers, even when they lie about their meter being broken.

    (313): Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, “rough nite? Let me find you some music” . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.

    (703): I don’t know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling” you didn’t have to sell us out phil!” to the cab driver.

    (416): Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home

    (714): there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.

    (514): i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving

    (281): 3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.

    (479): You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.

    (519): I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.

    (404): A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.

    (773): our cab driver is having phone sex.

    Got any stories to add to the list? Put it in the comments

    • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 20, 11 at 1:37pm

      Cab driver picks us up, two blocks away from home he stops and sells the guy in the front seat pain pills, almost puked again after that one

    • Submitted by 702 on Oct 20, 11 at 1:53pm

      I apparently gave the cabbie a massage and began psychoanalyzing his life and cried with him about how hard life is.

    • Submitted by 464 on Oct 20, 11 at 2:06pm

      our cab driver won’t stop touching me…

    • Submitted by 780 on Oct 21, 11 at 2:35am

      our cab driver was screaming about bush parties while taking us on an impromptu tour of the city…

    • Submitted by 310 on Oct 30, 11 at 2:26pm

      i have a cab driver (his name is Abdul) who will pick you up anywhere, at any time. he only does this for drunk high school girls.

    • Submitted by 703 on Nov 1, 11 at 3:20pm

      im pretty sure our cab driver was hungover when he crashed into the car in front of us, on our way to the airport…

    • Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 13, 11 at 3:38am

      I blacked out and when I came to I was in a ghetto in Milwaukee with a guy I had just met that day.Neither of us could quite remember how to get back to the dorms, he called a cab. Needless to say, my drunk self thought it appropriate to give him a congatulatory hand job in the back of the cab…

    • Submitted by 778 on Dec 22, 11 at 3:14am

      Cabbie drove to the park to watch the fireworks with him when we asked for the bar. At least he let me drink my beer.

    • Submitted by 847 on Mar 20, 12 at 7:26pm

      apparently i told him i wanted to go home, but wasn’t very specific about where that was… woke up in my cab drivers bed. he drove me to my apartment the next morning.

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